What else is concerning is the long list of side-effects. Hair-loss, heart and vein damage, digestive issues, to name a few. It's a very long way from taking Emergency at the first signs of a cold. So, I'm not ashamed to say that I cried when the nurse explained the dangers of chemo to me at midnight last week. (Having shaken me awake from a relatively peaceful sleep.) It was a pretty crappy moment. It's not like I could say, "You know what? I think I'm going to go home and think about this for a few days and I'll get back to you." Cancer is impatient, and doesn't take rain-checks.
Here's my advice to anyone getting chemo: listen to music. Loud, fast, heart-pumping music. Silence is the worst. I was laying there as the nurse was prepping my IVs, getting the creepy chemo syringes ready, and I suddenly realized I wasn't scared or nervous (not as much as minutes earlier). All I thought was, "Well, this is just really boring." So, I grabbed my iPhone and flipped to my old jogging mix and turned up the volume. For the next hour, as she pushed the chemo into my veins, I rocked out to some of my favorite jogging tunes. Halfway through we were all singing and laughing. It was a very surreal experience.
Here's the mix I whipped up last week:
"Because We Can" Fatboy Slim (Moulin Rouge Soundtrack)
"The Blood of Cu Chulainn" Jeff Danna & Mychael Danna (From Boondocks Saints Soundtrack)
"We Didn't Start the Fire" Billy Joel
"Rolling in the Deep" Adele
"This is the Life" Amy McDonald
"Rockstar 101 (Dave Aude Remix)" Rihanna
"Typical Situation" Dave Matthews Band
"Keep it in the Family" Hybrid
Also, visualization is key. When I wasn't bobbing my head and picturing jogging through the trails of Kings Canyon National Park, I pictured a little Pac Man chomping away at a bunch of cancer cells. (Shout out to my Good Karma Buddy Kathy for this!)
Haven't made my chemo mix for tonight yet, but planning on lots of loud techno and good beats.
Wish me luck, internet world!
Here's my mix for tonight! M.I.A. makes quite a few appearances.
"Da Funk" Daft Punk
"O... Saya" A.R. Rahman & M.I.A.
"Bucky Done Gun" M.I.A.
"Spaceman" Way Out West
"Dance Without You" Skylar Grey
"Barefoot Blue Jean Night" Jake Owen
"Coming Home" Diddy
"Lighters" Bad Meets Evil
"Cosmic Love" Florence + the Machine
"The a la menthe" La Caution
"Letting Go" Lupe Fiasco
"Paper Airplanes" M.I.A.